The only way to get what you really want is to let go of what you don’t want.” – Iyanla Vanzant
In order to get where you want and need to go, you must recognize what’s working well in your life, hold on to that and build it up. At the same time, you must let go of what’s not working well in your life so that you are free to move forward.
Change is not always easy, but you have the ability to decide what’s possible. Circumstances such as kids, finances and relationships may impact us but, if you really want it and believe that you can change your life, you can. The important thing is to have a vision and then support it with a plan.
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Once you have clarity and you’re ready to move forward, anything and anybody that’s negative, that’s weighing you down or holding you back must go.
There are some people, situations and lifestyles that drain your time and energy. They simply don’t work for your life anymore.
When I interviewed Alicia Keys, whose voice, career and album are all “On Fire”, we discussed the power of letting go of things in your life that are no longer working – everything from hair to lifestyle to people.
I couldn’t help but ask Alicia about cutting her hair. It was a dramatic change from the Alicia Keys that the world has become accustomed to seeing on the small or big screen singing at award shows, performing in videos, promoting her projects, speaking about issues close to her heart or more recently, acting.
Whether her hair was in braids, natural curls, coiffed or flat-ironed, the one constant is that it was always pretty long.
Here’s what Alicia had to say about cutting her hair: “You know, I think I just feel more easy. I definitely feel like when you’ve had your hair for a lot of years – and then you cut it – it kind of lets go of a lot of years and just kind of allows you to be fresh and start again. And that’s a lot about … just finding my place and my newness now and it just feels really empowering, sexy and fly.”
Hair is a reflection of our essence. The Bible says that a woman’s hair is her crowning glory. So what does your hair say about you? Is it free, heavy, fun, sexy, stylish or conservative, dark, light or bright? Changing your hair is like changing your identity.
When a woman cuts her hair, it’s like cutting ties with her old self and beginning anew. Stylist Mattie Michelle says, “By the time a client comes to me to get a major haircut, it’s usually a reflection of change that’s already happening in her life. Most times, a haircut is a manifestation of a metamorphosis from the inside out.”
Letting go of your hair can often make you feel exposed and vulnerable because there is less to hide behind. If you cut your hair really short, it can almost be like a coming out party, letting go of what was and reinventing yourself.But you must be ready to be revealed.
I, too, am on that journey of letting go of my permed hair and entering the natural world of curls. Check out my transition and first hair post above:
I’d rather see a person with a natural mind and processed hair than a processed mind and natural head. – Erykah Badu
Are you ready for a fresh start? What do you need to cut out of your life so that you can begin again, get free, be light and limber?
Letting go of something, be it hair, a relationship or a job, does not have to be a negative. Sometimes you just need a change, something new, fun, exciting and different. Go get it!
